I'm a little reluctant to say that I have a problem with people using English incorrectly because surely some knucklehead will come along and kindly proof-read all my previous posts for correctness.
However, the mis-use of the word "literally" is about to bring me to my knees. For some reason, this is the one that the crazies seem to prefer:
Patient One: "I was literally screaming my head off."
Me: No, ma'am, your head is still, in fact, attached to your neck, as evidenced by the fact that you are able to carry on this conversation, as unpleasant as it is.
Patient Two: "I am literally bouncing off the walls."
Me: No, sir, unless you are calling me from some distant planet where gravity is not king, I'm sure you are just a little antsy.
Patient Three: "I am literally losing my mind."
Me: (imagining this woman pursuing her elusive mind around the living room, whistling and for some reason, shaking her keys at it) Ma'am, hold to speak to the doctor.
Sometimes my mental images of these people benefit them greatly.