Thursday, September 25, 2008

I wonder...

I'm wondering why aging can't be graceful for everyone. My own grandmother lived to be in her 90s and just slipped off one day. By the time we knew anything was wrong, she was already gone.

Then, on the other hand, there are people like Mr. Jim, aged 86. Mr. Jim, who served his country in World War II, got shot, and went back for more, who buried his wife after a long struggle with her illness, raised a mentally impaired son by himself before losing him as well at far too young an age. Mr. Jim, whose body is "eaten up" with cancer, who has been written off by doctors and family members alike and yet continues to hold on. Mr. Jim, who currently resides in a hospital after falling one too many times and is struggling with the idea of either living in a nursing home or giving up his independence and moving in with his niece.

It is absolutely heartbreaking to see him so wasted away and despondent. His will to live is incredibly strong and yet, I wonder why. I wonder what gives a man the will to go on. And I wonder if I would be so determined to survive if I were in his position.

I love Mr. Jim dearly, and one of the best things about him is his attitude on his "good days." With everything he's been through, he'll always claim to be blessed. He never ceases to thank God for His many gifts.

It just hurts to see him in pain.

2 comments:

Suldog said...

I've said a prayer for Mr. Jim. I wish I could do more. If there is anything, I'll be glad to contribute.

Carol said...

My heart aches for Mr. Jim...and for you, watching him suffer. My mother is 88, in a wonderful assisted living facility...but writhes in chronic pain. Even with a pain pump pushing morphine through her frail body 24/7, she suffers. It hurts to watch her.

I will say some prayers for Mr. Jim...and for you.